Life Was My Writer's Block

You’ve probably noticed I’ve been….gone. I haven’t been writing. The blame is all mine for this crumbling of the texture of The Pecking Hen. I went through some shit. Some real shit. And when I was finally able to pull my head out of my ass long enough, I started to live again. It was a relief.

And, while I really never stopped following her on social media throughout the years, I started to become inspired by someone of an unexpected origin. 

Ali Arnone is an…acquaintance?...from college. We ran in the same circle but probably said two words to each other over those crazy years- most likely while vying to get the attention of the bartender at CVP (Justinian!) to order another drink. We knew OF each other. And frankly, it was a damn shame. Because as adults, we have both seen, through our blogs, that we are very similar in a lot of ways. And while I don’t claim to be a blogger of Ali’s echelon, (she’s gotten shout outs and posts on some big blog sites and has a huge reader base), we started to realize we had a kind of blogger/reader/woman kinship kind of thing going on as we would correspond about each other’s writing, etc. We could’ve been fast buddies if we could’ve just stepped out of that convoluted crowd we ran in for one minute to see each other for the similar beings we were! Now, as a real bonafide "adult" (please stifle your laughter), I have grown to consider Ali a friend and someone who I admire for her wit, wisdom and not to mention she's downright stunning. 

As you’ve probably guessed, Ali has a blog. A pretty amazing, honest, funny and frankly, damn good blog. And as the years have progressed and we both entered our…[insert whisper here]… ahem… thirties, she wrote more and more. As opposed to letting life get in the way of her writing, she did the opposite. She wrote more. And I have been hooked.

And when the haze of confusion and grief and soul-searching was lifted, I started to wonder where my writing voice had gone? Why had I allowed myself to stop writing?

So I reached out to Ali. I knew she would have the right words for me, and I was right. Below, you will find her brilliant words that struck my heart and gave me my gumption back.

So, thank you, Ali, for making the Hen get her “peck,” back;)

Q. Dear AA,

Life has kicked me in the ass and I have lost my blog voice! What can a blog-girl do to get her swag back on the keyboard?

Sincerely,

Life Was My Writer’s Block

A. 

Dear Life Was My Writer’s Block,

I’m so glad you wrote.  Our friendship is an interesting one; as we went to college together and frequented the same bars and parties but never really ‘hung out,’ if that makes sense.  But alas, social media has been used for good and the very thing you’re having trouble getting back into – BLOGGING – is the very reason we still stay in touch and have a bond ten years later.  We both have blogs and for the past year or so we've been following each other’s musings and exchanging emails to discuss posts, books we've read and just talkin’ shop.  If that doesn't show you the power of writing, I don’t know what will.

That said, I understand you’re in a writing rut.  This happens.  But I’m here to give a jump-start to that dead battery of yours, in an effort to give you just the right amount of juice you need to get going again.  Why?  Because writing is therapeutic.  And who doesn't need a little therapy?

For lack of a better term, you've had some shit luck.  You've gone through a terrible ordeal; one that no person and woman should have to endure in their lifetime.  As a result, you did what most people in your shoes would do and probably SHOULD do, which is vanish a bit.  You said peace out to Facebook, a move I admire and quite frankly do not have the gumption to pull off, and you stopped writing on Pecking Hen.  You mentioned to me that your blog and your writing had become “morose” and I don’t think that’s the kind of person you are or want to be.  I know you as a fun, free-spirited, kind and positive person.  But as I said…the shit luck.  It’ll certainly change a person and their demeanor.

But here’s why I think you need to start writing again.  I think you need to write because it will help.  Help others who have been in your shoes, help those who HAVEN’T been in your shoes to understand you better, and most importantly… help YOU.  Help you to move on and start fresh and crawl out of the rut.  Write because we need real women who deal with real-life experiences and don’t claim to shoot glitter out of their pores and live their lives in this gross and unattainable perfection.  Write for a support system.  Write because life – even the dirty, nasty, crappy parts – can be funny.   Write because you have a great job and husband and friends and family and dogs and a myriad of other things that inspire you.  DON’T write because you’re trying to forget and ignore the trials and tribulations of the past few years, but because you want to heal and grow from them.

Write because you’re good at it.

Write because I said so. J

Best of luck,

Your friend & fellow writer AA

You can read Ali’s musings on her blog at http://alia15.tumblr.com